Let’s squeeze all of the holiday-ness possible into one post! Holidays are a crazy time for me and I used to hate being in the midst of everything, but I have struck up an understanding with the holidays – I’ll stop telling myself how much I hate you, in return you need only to enrich my relationships, perceptions, and reflective time. Ask and receive.
The holidays were a little less than grand this year. Good spirit was alive and well, but everyone has been so tired; an emotionally (and somewhat financially) draining year has taken its toll on everyone in my family and we are just getting in a place of renewed energy flow.
Goodness Gracious Thanks(ful)giving!
I made this year hard on myself because most of it was spent not listening. A Course in Miracles’ Introduction states that the course is not optional, but the whether you learn through pain or through joy is a choice – and what a painful year indeed. My eyes have been opened, my faith and fervor renewed, but I still have so very far to grow. This year, in addition to the usual pillar relationships, I am most thankful for the acquired ability to find grace in every moment. My facebook official thankful declaration is:
“I am truly thankful because I have come to realize that there is no such thing as trials and tribulations, there are only blessings in really ugly wigs. They should be treasured just as much as the ones in sparkly wigs. Not only is this shift in perception a miracle in itself, it makes you into a magnet for lovely things. Lesson of the year: vulnerability is strength in its own right and even through the bad things you have to stay open so they can pass THROUGH you.”
If there is anything that makes me twitch is Christmas shopping. Well, shopping of any kind really sends me all comatose and cross-eyed. So this year I did (almost) all of my Christmas shopping online – awesome sales, eliminated most of the stress (some presents still haven’t gotten here!), able to access personalized/handcrafted gifts. My favorite part of Christmas is the giving and that gets so lost on me every year being in the bustle of Potomac Mills Mall so as you can imagine I was quite elated! Also I don’t wrap things, but I am seriously considering stocking up on holiday bags and tissue paper next year I know some people were let down my lack of presentation. I just wanted to get that gift in view of their eyeballs that much more quickly! Oh by the way, I bought a new Red Book. Merry Christmas to me. 🙂
Should I count the end of the world?
As we all know – it didn’t. However I would like to present you with a short obituary on the things I would love to see ended.
Here lies debt. Cold, unforgiving, solemn. You weren’t all bad, you taught me humility and reminded me to live within my means, but you also taught me shame and pride – you taught me that I can roll you over onto one more source and thus amassing even more of you. Our relationship has not been long, but you gave me the gift of initiative and integrity. If you borrow money return it, because I do not want you my life any longer. I think I’ve learned the lessons necessary to release this relationship. Adieu.
Fear of not being loved. How long have we been together now? Seems all of my life. You’ve encouraged me to act erratically and drive away the people that love me most because I assume you are right. Who would love me? Who could ever really see me and continue to love me – to stay? You are an asshole and I say good riddance to you. I will however thank you for not allowing me to take people (and love) for granted – for humility, compassion, and innate ability to be able to sit with and enjoy myself.
Shame. I knew you well. I wish that I could have embraced and forgiven you in some light, but I’m afraid I’m the one that pulled the trigger here and I am not one ounce of sorry.
Apathy. Though I did not know you on a personal level, you’ve plagued the lives of those around me from time to time. You irritate the hell out of me by extension so I’m glad that I never got to know you because you are far more painful than anything else I have ever come across. “I don’t care” can be the most detrimental word combo if used appropriately. Seeya.
A few handfuls of dirt and forgiveness over each and we’re done.
And oh, oh, oh, New Year’s Eve
You would be suprised I actually don’t have too much to say on that subject. Only this:
Bless me with the tools to overcome, the faith to always see the path, the love to thrive and create, the miracles to create balance where lack is (incorrectly) perceived, clarity of intention and wants, and an open flow of abundance of all wonderful and necessary things. Stay tuned folks, this year’s going to be a magical one.
Let your freak flag fly high,
- A Christmas Thank-You (petcarerx.com)
- ‘Tis the season for miracles (viewfrommiddleclass.wordpress.com)