Photo Provided By Josh Felise via Unsplash, kiss, couple, love

An Ode To Quiet Love

I forgot about quiet love.
Love that only subtly let’s its presence be known.
I forgot about gentle love.
Love that doesn’t prod or pull you into unnatural shapes and tornadoes.
I forgot so deeply that I held no regard,
no value,
no recognition for the thing.
I’d only known love out loud.
The kind of love that flings itself up the stairs
to make declarations before the world.
The kind that stamps its feet
and says every little sweet nothing way out loud
because the noise makes the love real and big.
Enduring love that stings,
but is oh so satisfying
in that you know the passion and tension
will keep you going
well past the point
“let’s call it quits and still be friends”.
I began to believe that quiet love
is not love at all,
but a passionless,
cowardice,
avoidance of emotion.
I couldn’t see it as a real love.
I thought real love twirls you around the dance floor,
fights for you –
even if it’s against you,
and makes the grand gesture at just the right time.
I forgot about silent love that penetrates the soul
with just time and no words.
I fought the legitimacy of it all –
my intimacy always caught in frenzy.
I forgot about quiet love.

This is when I realized that I had succumb to a hidden Disney princess dream. How had I deluded myself into thinking it had passed me over? There it was: I wasn’t waiting for the someone to rescue me from a tower – I’m no damsel, but I was waiting though for someone to make the grand gesture. Run to the mountaintops and scream their love for me, prove their love by slaying dragons. This dynamic set me up for even a nice enough guy to never get past the butterflies stage because he couldn’t pull off this thing. I didn’t even know what it was, but it was big and I knew at the end of it that I would know for sure this man would love me forever and there would be no question in my mind.

The only problem with that is the novelty wears off and I’m always looking for the next big gesture to keep my attention, to keep up with the definition of love that I’ve formed.

To be honest, I enjoy a great, big love with passion and healthy dose of tension to keep it going. In my frenzied nature I filled the canyons with thoughts and questions. Don’t question every quiet moment, every wordless exchange. Not everyone can be “on” all of the time. Not every moment is soaked in passion and bliss.

How loud someone confesses their love to you is a poor measuring stick.

What preconceived notion of love are you willing to release?

Love Letters to Strangers and 33 Things that Are Better When Winterfied (aka Reasons to Become a Winter Enthusiast)

How do you start to fall in love with a season you’ve loathed for a lifetime?

Add some love to the world.

Write love letters.

Lots of love letters.

Passionate. Funny. Short. Long. Witty. Rhyming. Inspirational. Doesn’t matter. Just write ’em.

What to do with all of that love you just penned?

Leave them.

Leave them everywhere.

Tuck them in magazine pages.

Prop them up on ledges.

Also, create a list of things that are better when winterfied. Here we go:

1) Hot chocolate – REAL DEAL hot chocolate. I love going to ACKC in Del Ray

2) Snuggles. Serioulsy, it’s just better when there’s a chill in the air.

3) Spurring random sing-a-longs is perfectly acceptable. I spend all year bursting out into song and people just blink at me (dgaf), BUT during the holiday season as long as it’s some jolly song people will join in! I love to spread the merry.

4) Fuzzy overload. Blankets, socks, sweaters. Gimme.

5) Soups, stews, and the like. Homemade. Give me a root vegetable some cheese and bacon and it is on! (Bonus: the abundance of root veggies gives me a chance to experiment with veggies I don’t normally eat in warmer weather).

6) Cinnamon. On. Everything.

7) Red wine. Cab Sauv seems to be that much more satiating in the winter weather.

8) This scarf that I just bought. In LOVE.

9) No one questions me shirking social obligation in favor of my faux mink blanket and deluxe queen bed.

10) On that note: it’s  the perfect time for reflecting and flying through creative endeavors.

11) Bonfires and s’mores because they go oh-so-perfectly together.

12) Hottubbing on snowy nights.

13) Snuggie justification.

14) Everything is covered in lights beginning in fall. Twinkle lights abound, like the stars came down for a visit.

15) People reflect the giving and humanity I know we’re capable of year-round.

16) Gatherings with friends and family I don’t normally get to see.

17) Cookies. COOKIES. COOOOOOOOKIES. Oh, and fudge,  I love homemade fudge.

18) Tights and extra-large thrifted man sweaters.

19) Tights in general because I love them.

20) Little to no people on the nature trails – there are times I enjoy making friends and there are times I enjoy my solitude Cold weather usually compels me to the latter.

21) All of the holidays clustered together. Never stop the celebrations!

22) Snowball fights.

23) Leaves crunching under my boots – simple things.

24) Creamy, thick, high gravity beers – stouts, porters, and lagers, oh my!

25) Twilight, my favorite time of day, is that much more breathtaking.

26) Searching for,  and cracking open,  a new (read: the perfect) planner. This year it’s this one.

27) Bubble baths. If there could just be never-ending bubbles.

28) Hilarious blockbuster family movie releases. Open season for Pixar.

29) Boot buddies. I needed these right meow!

30) Grey is a real color that I somehow forget about until winter and it looks so much better with the jewel and wine tones of the season.

31) Drastically reduced FOMO, maybe I convince myself everyone else hates the cold as much as me.

32) Intentional gratitude abound.

33) Whimsy is the flavor of the season.

What a Wonderful World: One of the Loveliest Sights

 

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This past weekend was, oh you know what it was, the BIG Sunday – let’s just say it wasn’t my favorite game. This What A Wonderful World Wednesday is about a moment. For anyone that doesn’t know, I’m a proud Devil Pup, my father served USMC for 20 years and I also have countless friends and acquaintances in the Armed Forces. I’m sure that everyone has that one thing that gets them in the feels and mine is rooted both active duty and retired military personnel – it always pulls at my heartstrings in a way most other things can’t.

I just came out of the kitchen holding my plate stacked with “noms” when the National Anthem came on and, of course, I stopped right where I was standing out of respect; from there I watched all of my friends listening to Renee Fleming sing; I’m not even sure a simple “sing” would justify her amazing rendition, but I digress. That feeling was indescribably lovely, I was just bursting with pride and love for everyone around me.

I’m always so grateful for my friends and family, but that moment has been stuck in my head since Sunday night and will probably be one of my favorite wallflower moments for a long time to come.

"Image courtesy of nixxphotography / FreeDigitalPhotos.net"

“Image courtesy of nixxphotography / FreeDigitalPhotos.net”

Be Your Own Cheerleader: Why You Should Celebrate the Crap You’re Going Through Today

Good Morning Lovely!

Sometimes it feels like we move from one hurdle to the next and we’re never going to get on level ground. Life has ups and downs and quite frankly shit happens. Your perception and reaction are the only things that you have control over. So take control.

Growth is ceaseless. We move from one end of the spectrum to the other and even as we abolish fears and limiting beliefs along the way all new ones slither in and the process of letting go begins all over again. Fear is a reality. Change is absolutely guaranteed. To avoid or deny these is to avoid or deny vital pieces of the human experience.

I began with this issue of beginning things. I tapped, affirmed, and trudged my way past that hill only to meet another – finishing. Same BS story in a different (spectacularly bad) outfit, “I’m not good enough”.

New hills are fantastic things – signs of growth and metamorphoses. It’s only daunting if that’s the feeling you let it take on; put away the violin and celebrate that you’re moving forward! Be your own cheerleader simply because you conquered and got *ish done! Your problems of today aren’t exactly the same as your problems of yesterday.

Need more? How about another angle?

#firstworldproblems I love it. It’s become one of those things that we just say.

“Spilled my soy latte ALL OVER my desk, saved my phone just in time! #firstworldproblems.

 

Well, you’re right… those are first world problems. For the love of everything good thank you for acknowledging that. Most of the people I know have never gone hungry much less actually have to go and forage for food. Most of the people I know have never lived without electricity and running water. Most of the people I know can escape their first world problems by watching TV or wading around in the social media pool – which is in itself a first world problem.

Be GRATEFUL for your trials because they are yours for a reason; you are never given more than you can take and the divine knows that you’re a bad ass. Chances are you are far stronger and much more powerful than you are willing to see or admit.

Love Always,

Kiera

If God only gives you what you can handle, he must think I’m a badass! – Rotten eCards

Musings on Learning Through Joy Instead of Pain

Quite simply, we were meant to learn through joy and love, but somewhere along the way we are taught that the hardship and tragedy are what teach us the most important lessons and they become the only ones we keep. So we learn that pain is the best teacher whether ours, a close friends, a strangers – it doesn’t matter because tragedy pulls at our heartstrings and plays on our fears; it resonates with us in a way joy just doesn’t. Think of a child lovingly corrected time and again not to touch a hot stove, only when the child burns himself does he learn his lesson. Why? It’s all with good intention, we learn the lesson to avoid the pain and we teach in order to help others avoid pain.

What if there is another way?

What if we allow love, joy, laughter, community was to be a primary teacher?

What if we let miracles teach us and correct our perception of lack?

That’s a lot of what if’s, but the world isn’t built on that – this world is built on action and so the next question is “How do we put this into action?” Well, the more simple way to begin is by cultivating awareness, i.e.  learning to pay attention to those little “red flags” and niggling feelings at the pit of the stomach or bad vibes. There are so many times that we know (or maybe just have an inkling) we are getting ourselves into an unhealthy situation and we keep on pressing through because we choose to ignore the signs that are being thrown to our attention; the spirit is trying to gently course correct do yourself a favor and pay attention.

  • Learn your “signs”. Think about anytime you just *knew* something was off, what did it feel like? Were you restless? Nervous? Did your stomach twitch? Did your heart ache? Listen to your body, it a first line defense.
  • Trust yourself. If you feel like something is dicey, don’t just ride it out because you think you’re being paranoid.
  • Build your relationship with your higher power/inner-guide. You need to know HOW the Universe communicates to you.
  • Trust your higher power/inner-guide to take care of you and then, wait for it… shut your mouth, open your heart, and LISTEN.
  • Stick with it, your intuition is a muscle – the more you use it, the stronger it gets.

Pain can strengthen us, but so can love. Teaching and learning from a place of avoidance still focuses on pain and still attracts pain. When we allow ourselves to be corrected through love instead of enduring hardship and pain to get the point across we teach those around us to do the same and they teach those around them. The whole world learning through love, isn’t that a beautiful thought?

How will you shift your perception of life lessons? Will you invite love to be your guide rather than just avoidance of pain?